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Koalas, Crocs and Dingoes…oh my!

December 31, 2010

Me pondering the next blog...and view of our room.

Seeing how Nikki absolutely adores anything furry, (myself included) I knew where our first breakfast spot would have to be.

There is a little breakfast nook up the way that serves a great meal with one of the best egg chefs ever. She has like a dozen recipes and one grill. So tasty and every egg is perfect. Whenever someone ordered she replied “no worries” and put these little perfect eggs on their plate. For those of you who like to count. She went thru 260 eggs on this day, and on a busy day, she said she will go thru 500.

Oh yea, I almost forgot…there are also Koala bears. 3 of them, hanging out in trees next to where you chow down. Nikki of course retrieved and memorized all their names, Waldo, Willy, and Elvis. Waldo was a real charmer. Posing for photographs, literally posing, the staff would tap him on the shoulder and he would look directly at your camera.

Nikki getting ready to steal this thing...

Afterwards, we went on a short tour of a little sanctuary behind the place, where some proceeds go to Wildlife Conservatory. They had dingoes, which are basically dogs. A huge crocodile that was about 15 feet long. He had his mouth open and didn’t move at all. I asked the tour guy if it was real and he said, “don’t put your fingers in that fence, mate”. They feed him at 330pm each day, we are sooooo going back for that. I just hope they don’t feed him Koala’s, that could ruin our holiday for Nikki. They had these parrots that had a 3 year old education and were screaming “goodbye” as we walked up to their cage. Seems like they need more edu-ba-cation. They had wombats, potoroos and bettongs, which from a painters perspective, are basically rats. Kangaroos, which you could feed and then…you guessed it…more Koala’s!

I had to hold Nikki back from jumping into their area. She was screaming, “I want one!” and knocked over some small Japanese children on the way over to pet the little guy. Next question for the tour guide from Nikki…”does anyone in Australia have a Koala Bear as a pet?”…he emphatically answered “No, absolutely not”. Then started to rail off a list of why it would be impossible and morally wrong to keep one of these bears as a pet, but Nikki’s eyes were glazed over, and you could tell she was plotting how to hit the tour guide in the noggin with her camera, snatch the furry creature and catapult over the wall of the zoo. Alas, the Koala made his way safely back to the tree and into a deep nap state as I picked up Nikki, kicking and screaming “I am his momma!” and escorted her past the traumatized Asian children.


The chow here has been damn fine since we arrived. And pricey. This island is basically owned by one group, and they charge appropriately for everything. In the States, this is called a monopoly or collusion. However, here on THEIR island it is called “stupid tourist syndrome”. (STS) Since there are a lot of English here, they have a marina side dive restaurant called Popeye Fish and Chip. It was the best fries and fish, I have ever had. (lunch for both of us $35 USD) And take note Iron Chef’rs and Hells Kitchen’rs…they got this squeeze on package of Vinegar Dressing, stuff is gold! I used to think the fries with vinegar at the Ohio State fair were the best, forget about it, blown away by this Vinegar Dressing that is syrupy goodness. Also, there are some funny terminology differences with the chow. Ketchup is called Tomato Sauce and will set you back one dollar ($1 USD). Calories is called Energy…and the pints of the Gold beer I now love so much, 447 Energies. I will need to do more 16 ounce bicep curls to burn these golden beauties off.

Sunset Cruise

Sunset Party! No, Vegas party people. This was different. We went on a sunset cruise last night and it was amazing. A sailboat with about 20 sunburned folks on it. We sailed from the marina to the Northern tip of the island and back while the sun set over the other Whitsunday Islands. Nikki and I sat on a cushion at the bow and it was beautiful. ($120 USD per couple) Well worth it. The views while on the ocean were, as one of the first mates called it, “gods country”. They served Nikki some really tasty Aussie White Wine and low and behold had my favorite Gold Beer. Nice way to start off our evening.

...right before Nikki threw me overboard

Rolling Count of how many times Nikki has said she wants to bring a Koala Bear home with her: 40

Quotes of the Day

“Dickhead!” mumbled by an old American dude who clearly pulled in front of an Aussie couple with his “buggy” (golfcart) and they both came to a tire screeching halt, reminded me of Kevin Kline in “A Fish Called Wanda” yelling “assholllllllllllle” as he drove on the wrong side of the road

I spoke to an Englishman about hiking up to Passage Peak, 239 meters above sea level…and his reply “why would you hike that!?.. are you mad, man?…you need a buggy, a buggy is so much fun, we have a buggy for the whole week, rent a buggy!” and then he dangled his buggy key in my face like saying…do you get it now? Get a buggy.

We spoke at length with a French Couple and at the end of the sunset cruise, I asked him if he wanted to go for a beer, his answer, “No, I don’t want to do that” and he walked off the boat.

Finally, a restaurant owner on the phone yelling into the voicemail of a late employee, and I quote exact: “Jade, it is 10 minutes after 8am, I don’t care if your parents have died and you are on a plane going home, get here now, I got a fucking Koala Bear that fell out of a tree and no one to run the egg station” … as he was slamming down the phone he said to me “sorry about my language, mate…I used to get blasted too when I was young, but I always showed up for work” and his eyes stared at me looking for some type approval and understanding comment, but all I could think of to say was “wait a minute, a fucking Koala Bear fell out of a tree!?”


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