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We Made It!

December 30, 2010

We made it!  We have arrived at Hamilton Island, Australia.  Part of the Great Barrier Reef.

Over 28 hours in a plane and four different flights.  We left at 3pm on Monday, and arrived at 1pm on Wednesday  (we crossed the international date line and “lost a day”).  Later I may blog/blah/blob about the in flight adventures…but for now, we must focus on our new little island of paradise.

As I type this it is 330pm at home on Wednesday.  Here it is 630am on Thursday.  Below is our view from our hotel room.  Amazing.  I have stayed at lot of places, but never have I seen 6 other remote islands from my hotel perch.

The island is small.  Only golf carts are on the island.  It is funny because the locals have supped up golf carts and the tourists drive the slower ones with seatbelts.  This is the only island in the Great with a full scale airport.  But, let me explain.  You land and exit the plane from the front and back onto the actual runway.  The airport is a small building that is actually open air.  Then you grab your suitcase off the luggage buggy/truck and you are on your way to your vaca, man!

The Water and Weather

After getting off our final flight, I made it a point to get in the friggin’ water as soon as possible.  Warm and clear. Near bathwater warm, and the air temperature is in the high 80’s with mostly sunshine and some rolling clouds. Awesome.  People here are into activities and it shows in the ocean, paddle boarders, snorkelers, wind surfing.  One funny attraction, Dudes in bikini briefs with Australia written across the back.  Not as sexy as Brazil with all their thongs and models, but I thought I would mention it for the ladies.

Leg Calf Cramp’n

Did you want to hear about our legs?  Oh, sure you do.  After all that flying,  Nikki and I noticed are legs were swollen and weak.  Like, tired from walking the beach weak.  And the island is very moutain’ess, so when walking up and down the street, we were like old men, huffing and puffing our way to dinner.  My wife is not going to be happy I wrote this, but she had “cankels”, all swollen up ankles that you “can’t see”…hence the name…Cankles.  So, as we walked the beach, I asked her to massage my calves, being that it is our honeymoon, I expected her to whip out the coconut oil and give a rub down on the spot.  She politely declined, and asked me to flip over a large boulder and see if any “critters” were under there.


Anyone who knows me, and has a pair of anything, probably likes beer.  So here is my update on the Suds from Heaven status.  The Lager here sucks.  Tastes bitter and metallic.  I had a Crown Lager and a Carlton Draught Lager.  Both I had to force down.  But as a wise man once said, “there are no bad beers, just some are better than others”.  So, I moved on to what they call their Gold beers.  Similar to our pilsners, and I think we have found our match for the month.  Crown Gold and Pure Gold.  They are smooth, about 4.6% alcohol and taste good with the views.  Plus, after all that travel, dehydration and altitude…they made my liver happy.   More to come on beer consumption, ofcourse.


I think I messed up big time on the money front.  Remember my earlier post about the USD (United States Dollar being 10% stronger than the Aussie Dollar).  No, probably incorrect.  We needed money to transfer by bus at the airport from the International terminal to Domestic.  Why, they are charging $5.50 per person for this is beyond me?  So, I go to get money transferred at the airport Travelex guy, the rate says $1.09.  He takes my $200 American cash, charges a $12 commission and gives me $170 back.  Now, if my math before was correct, I would have gotten about $220 back.  But, I royally jacked it up.  Our dollar is 10% less than my atrocious math skills estimated.  And thus, this vacation just skyrocketed by 20%.  I blame my accountant, circus freaks, and the American education system for this math error, which is clearly not my fault.  ALSO, It didn’t help that when the exchange guy gave me my Aussie dollars, he said “don’t spend it all in one place” and then winked.  No worries, I contacted our dogs and they are wiring more money, so as long as the pooches come thru, the honeymoon will continue.


As we were walking home from our first Aussie dinner, I noticed that everyone is a dick.  They were cutting in front of me when walking to the pool, to the swim up bar, to the beach, home from dinner.  I thought everyone here was supposed to be super friendly?  Aussie dudes are big, like Rugby big, and they all have tattoos, real men tattoos… like all over their chest, neck and on the back of their legs.  I mentioned this collision issue to Nikki.  She said, “it is because you are walking on the wrong side genius…just like how they drive here on the opposite side, you are always walking into their lanes”…oh yeah, good point “I graduated from Ohio University in only 3 years” smarty pants.  We switched sides and walk on the opposite side, problem solved, no more running into sweaty chest tattoos and big dudes saying “excuse you mate”.

Rolling Count of how many times Nikki mentions she misses the dogs-5

Quotes of the Day

“I mean, who really douches anymore, that stuff gets in there and washes away your natural flora”  Kelley Hannan, who was so nice to drive us to the airport and provide the quote of Monday

“Long, Mate”                                                                                                                                                                   a Fathers quote, while rolling his eyes, with screaming twin kids strapped to his back and front,  as they were boarding the plane with me from LAX to Sydney, his response to me when I asked “hey man, how long is this flight?”..”Long Mate”…end of that conversation

Fact of the Day

Koala beers have no natural enemies.  Their only true enemy, is that they give each other Chlamydia.  No joke.


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